For the past few days, I have been hooked onto this online game call the Mystery PI. It is a game is which you are led to several locations, and in each location you have to find a list of items as instructed in order to receive pieces of clue to solve puzzles.
I first played with part 1 about 3 years ago and now is playing with part 2 with newer and more sophisticated graphics and rules.

The main thing I wanted to say is not just about how fun the game is but how it actually taught me something.

One interesting thing they added in the new series is that they do not just list the items as it is. For example, they will not put a dog as a dog, but might put something like a man’s best friend…
When I first started the game, I realized that I couldn’t find some of the items because I had misunderstood the hints, or to be more exact, assumed that the item to look for had to be “THIS”… the “THIS” meaning, something I had pre-concepted wrongly in my mind. In the end, I realized, I had let many items right before my eyes “pass by” because I was too inflexible to change my mind set. For example, I could be asked to find a lock, and while I was busily looking for a lock, it could have been not the physical lock but the words LOCK spelled out somewhere.

After learning this lesson, every time I start a new game now, the first thing I tell myself to stop doing is to set my mind on a fix answer and then look for the item. Instead, I have to keep lmy eyes wide open while my mind continues to generate possibilities of what the answer to the hint could be.

Somehow, I think it applies greatly to the way we live our lives too. Do we fix our gaze just on one side of the coin that we fail to realize there is the other side too? Or do we busy ourselves with trying to brainwash other people and getting them to agree with ourselves that we fail to recognize the value of their input and also to allow ourselves a fresher perspective?

I know of a few people who are like that. They make comments like “everyone” thinks this way; it happens all of the time… it must be like this. There is no some… no possibilities.. it must be like this 100% of the time. I used to feel the adrenalin to rebut those statements(just for the sake of it) but now… in the same way, I am training or at least making it my goal to first listen and then pick out the value of their comments. Probably they won’t change their minds about what they are saying, or maybe they will not listen more...

But well... once again it is up to individuals...

How many things do we actually need to survive?

On the very day that I arrived in Tokyo, I always had the feeling that I will be leaving soon. It wasn't because I hated Tokyo or what... in fact I really love my lifestyle now. But somehow I find myself in the always-ready-to-move mode.

This is evident in a few strange habits I have:

1. I kept the big boxes I used when I moved from Okazaki to Tokyo and is still collecting them because I feel need them soon when I move back to Singapore.

2. I do spend on "decorations", i.e unwanted, unecessary but things that looks nice in your house at times but I think twice about it now.

3. I am constantly thinking of what I can get rid in the house to lessen my load when I need to move. eg, old clothes, unwanted comics, Cds.

4. I do not have the motivation to splurge on expensive things even if they last a long time (electric appliances, furniture etc..) because I definitely do not want to bring them back to Singapore with me.

So... in one of those "thinking-of-what-to get-rid-of last night, I looked around my fully-packed apartment and thought to myself, "This is ridiculous! Does 1 person need everything that is filling up the apartment to survive?"

Strangely yes! I couldn't find anything that I should get rid of straight-away....

Forgiveness….

Last week, at a seminar in church, we were taught on the topic of forgiveness.
My pastor shared with us on that when he was still a young youth pastor, he met someone in church one day. That person appeared to be very “dark” and quiet so my pastor approached him and began to make friends with him. They got on very good terms and the guy will often visit him at his house and they will talk for hours.
Then the pastor’s wife got pregnant and he had to spend more time taking care of her especially nearing her delivery date. He started to spend a little lesser time with that guy, though still very concerned about him. However, he received a letter from that guy, a long 16-page letter. In the letter, the guy wrote about how he pitied the pastor’s wife and even his unborn child because he knows this pastor isn’t going to be neither a good husband nor father. He also pitied the rest of his friends and people around him…

To cut the long story short, the pastor avoided the guy until he was about to move to another state when the guy came up to him and they made up.

So his question was how do we response to such situations?

Often, we try to stand up for our own rights, say things in defense of ourselves or our situations. But what is our intention behind it? It could be for the benefit for the person (often not tho!), to show that we are right and the person is wrong, to feel a sense of superiority, to make sure we do not get stepped on…. And it goes on…

And then the pastor’s challenge was, will you say, “Ok, I forgive you.” And no more?

I had such a challenge today.

About some time ago, I lent about 1000USD to a friend, A touring in Japan because A did not change enough money then and also didn’t want to incur credit card nor exchange rate charges by withdrawing from a bank. The money was not meant for any emergency purposes but just for shopping. A assured me that I will get the money back in 3-4 months’ time because he/she over-shopped and needed some time to save up.

I was ok with it because I didn’t really needed the money urgently.
So 3-4 months crawled pass and there were no news from A….
So I decided to drop a casual message on FB to A to check if he/she still remembered the issue.

And the first reply I got was, “Oh I was thinking of getting B (another common friend of ours from the same country as A but also staying in Tokyo) to pass you the money when he comes back for a visit or pass you the money the next time we meet.

Hmm… But we have no plans to meet at all for the rest of the year nor even the next yet… and what was the talk about giving me the money back in 3-4 months’ time? I mean A could have the courtesy to drop me a msg…
But well I told A it is ok for the time-being just wanted to check what was going on and could be using some money because I will be travelling end of year.

So A said that he/she will send the money to me by the end of the year before my trip.

Then 2 days before this, he/she wrote another message to me saying that the rates now are very high and will thus wait till the rates drop or save up more and then return the money to me.

When I first heard that, I was actually pretty pissed. I have known A for a couple of years now, been through quite a lot of fun times together and I know A is not someone who doesn’t want to return the money. But because A comes from quite a well-to-do family and is working for the family, A does not really value each dollar and cent. If it was your intention to return the money to me by the time you promised, you would have save up a little by little every month, and not go for an Europe trip ( yes A did) and then come back crying to me saying you don’t have enough money? So do I have to wait till the rates drop? When will that be?

I wasn’t upset because I badly want my money back. I am just upset at A’s lack of sense of responsibility and accountability.

See? My anger is justified right??
Or so I thought…

On the way to work on the train today, I felt God whispering into my ear....
Despite all the “right justifications”, will you hold back all the anger and say to your friend, “It is ok. I understand. (and I forgive you like how God forgave me too. )

But I want to give A a piece of my mind!!

Yes… I know you do… but will you still released the same grace you received from me to your friend unconditionally? came God’s gentle whisper.

Sometimes we try to “comfort” ourselves and say, “It is ok, God will punish that person.” I don’t really agree with that. Because seriously speaking, not all villains do get a nasty ending.
But I think God is more concern about the condition of our heart rather that person. He wants our heart to be focused on the things ahead rather than but jailed by the thoughts of when the person will be punished, how the person should be punished etc… Forgiveness is not a condition of our heart. It is a decision (and may I add, an evidence to show we are appreciating grace and mercy)

Conclusion:I felt so mugh lighter after that. I was able to be thankful I wasn't in a situation I needed the money desperately. I wasn't burdened by A's lack of initiative. I was also able to catch a glimpse of Jesus's heart when he said to God. "Forgive them for they do not know what they are doing.". Trust me, I am not any holier than before. I just felt I kinda understand better why God thinks forgiveness is for the "victim".
I msg A and said it was ok I will wait till he/she is ready.

One more day to the weekend!

Bliss..

It is finally turning autumn....The temperature is finally dropping below 30 deg.

After 2.5 months of sweltering heat, we are finally seeing some signs of autumn approaching.

This is the hottest year in like 100 + years in Japan.

Many deaths due to heat-stroke, especially the elderly who are unable or have been mis-informed of the use of air-con.

Time to take out the autumn clothes!

Peace of Mind

I was introduced this lotion call the Peace of Mind ( by origins) by M-chan. It has a minty fragrance and gives you a tingling, cool feeling when rubbed onto the skin.

It helps to relieve fatigue, gives you a refreshing feel by a few ways, namely, breathing in the aroma and letting it clear your throat, nose etc.. applying directly on the temples, earlobes, necks etc...

So far it has been working pretty well for me. Won't say it work wonders because it didn't get rid of my terrible headache on Monday. ( Leaving the office and going home earlier is the faithful cure) But for people who work long hours deskbound and especially in front of the PC, I think this might just give you the little oasis you need.

I read the reviews and see that people use it on long flights, drives, trips to keep them afresh too. Do give it a shot if you experience tiredness at your work place!

A weekend getaway

I spent my weekend at a chalet, near Mt Fuji, just right across Yamanaka-ko.
This is a retreat venue owned by a christian organisation, rented especially to christian groups. (Pastors and missionaries get a special discount).

It was just so nice and relaxing to spend some time away from the bustling city, to a quiet peaceful chalet.
Campfire reminds me of my camping days back in school!
We had a round of name-games and then worship and also short sharing of the message.

not to forget the marshmallows after the campfire tasted great as well!

I am thinking if i should just go away myself for the weekend... time alone with God?

The power of words.

Something someone said has caused me to reflect on the way I speak and response to things.
When I did, I realised that I have a tendency to be harsher than I intended.
I don't know how many people out there I have hurt in the past or angered... but well, that is not the point now because it is already in the past.

I find myself editing my original email /sms replies now and replacing them with more postitive responses.
It could be something like someone says that he/she is sending food to me and my initial reaction will be, "Food? Are you sure it won't be spoilt when it reaches me?" to "Wow! Thanks! I am really looking forward to it!"
Because at the end of the day, even if the food really reaches me spolit, I should be focusing on the good intentions of the person more.

A simple time of reflection reveals many blindspots.