Random thoughts~~

I was just reading back on the entries of one of my best friends' OLD blog.
yah it is old cus she doesn't update it anymore...
I wish she does though.. because I really want to know more about what is going on in her life.

This is just one of the struggles I faced ever since I came to Japan. While I am excited to be able to experience a whole new lifestyle and culture which is so unreachable to a lot of people, my heart aches everytime I can't be part of a wedding nor a shoulder a loved one can lean on.

The above-mentioned friend's blog is really... just so "daily". She writes about meeting friends after work, spending time with family in supermarkets... Something just so mundane and normal.

But... the fact is, I don't have the luxury to say, "Let's meet for coffee" this weekend etc...

For the 5 years I have been here... I have been absent in the lives of so many people I love. And... the sad thing is... some have just moved on without me as well...

Sometimes I curl up in bed and just want to have a good cry and wallow in self-pity.

Sometimes I just feel like demanding some quality attention from these friends.

But at the end of the day...I am comforted by the presence of God. By his assurances. By his timely messages somehow or rather..

By just phonecalls coming from friends at times.

I used to hate to talk on the phone because I can't quite concentrate on just "hearing" someone ( rather talk face to face)..

but now.... I can't tell you how much I feel thankful and happy just to hear familar voices...

And... this will explain why I am actually heading overseas to visit a friend soon.

Seriously, it is not the wisest decision in this economy and times + personal financial situation. ( haa.. but trusting God will provide)

But... I just felt so strongly, I need to do something for my friend too. Need to leave more footsteps in her life before I disappear completely.. totally.. I guess I won't be able to make up for the time I wasn't with her in her low periods. (Thank God for the other people He has brought into her life too).

So here I go~~ Off to HK in may!

And can't wait to meet Baby Kait too! ( and mummy candy)